This week I have been studying the fruit of the Spirit: PEACE. Finished the study on love and joy, so this week it was peace. We all know what the lack of peace in our lives can do. "..a sleepless night filled with tossing and turning, fear that lodges itself like a pine cone in your stomach, a mind and body in perpetual motion, memories that imprison you repeatedly, unending strife, hopelessness, and the general, yet horrible, sense of being out of control."- Beth Moore. When I read that I was like, "Yes, that is me."
So then this week, as if I wasn't feeling like I had enough stress and lack of peace, a situation with an employee arose. The employee lost his temper and walked off the job. The problem was not that the employee has left, that happens all the time. It was the manner in which he left and what happened after he left. He was asked by Jon to leave the property until he could calm down, after being disrespectful to me and to Jon, after being very curt in his words and after saying he didn't need anything from HFC or us. When he was asked to leave the property, he said if he was leaving he wasn't coming back.
Okay, so tempers rose, but what happened after that was the problem. He proceeded to go to the HFC training center and rant and rave down there to the other employees there. Threatening us. Saying he had the pass codes for all the computer systems, the security system, and copies of our passports, etc. At this point the head of our security came and told us what was going on.
My level of anxiety/stress was so high that I really felt like I was going to have a heart attack or panic attack. I wanted to cry, to leave, to shut everything down... just be done with it all.
Did I remember my study on peace at all? Of course not. If I had I wouldn't have felt like I was having a panic attack. Sure I prayed. Tried to take deep breaths. But really? If I had truly internalized, contemplated, dwelled upon what God was trying to teach me, I think I would have saved myself from the panic. Verses like:
John 14:27 - "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid."
Philippians 4:7 - "And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."
PEACE. Wouldn't that be wonderful? To have PEACE no matter what the circumstance. I hope and pray that the more I am doing this study, the more I spend time in God's word, that I will learn. Learn to have peace that transcends ALL understanding.